Today, I Danced

When I was younger and still didn’t know what the phrase “morbidly obese” meant, I used to love to dance. I danced at SF cons, I danced at Mensa RGs (“regional gatherings”). I loved to dance in a room of people with the lights low and the music blaring. I exulted in moving with the music. I just loved moving.

Then a few years ago, attending dances at SF cons suddenly became a lot less fun. I realize now that the reason for that was because I was putting on weight, and it wasn’t as easy for me to move anymore. I got tired a lot sooner. And I just felt clunky and awkward.

But today I went to a wedding, and today, I danced. It was wonderful. I haven’t danced like that in years. I presently weigh less than I did when I graduated from high school (the groom and Best Man didn’t even recognize me at first, actually—they’re never seen me this thin), and moving is a lot easier these days.

It felt so wonderful to just move. I got a stitch in my side at one point, and some of my other muscles weren’t fond of the idea at first, but eventually things evened out and I felt fine. I didn’t get worn out or breathless like I’d grown accustomed to doing. It was glorious.

So whatever else might be happening on this journey of mine, today, I danced. I danced, and it was wonderful.


2 thoughts on “Today, I Danced

  1. coemaria says:

    I miss dancing like no one is watching. I haven’t done that in years. I used to dance – OMG, could I dance. I would even dance, do cartwheels, and land in the splits and get back up and dance some more. I never tired of it. Now, just the sheer thought of dancing starts sending me into panic attacks. I should write about something that happened earlier this year that involved dancing.

    I am glad you had a great time. I am also glad that the wedding was a smashing success. I miss everyone so much.

    • Astrid says:

      I don’t think I ever really thought about how much more fun it would be to be moving as I lost weight. I’ve been focusing on being able to find clothes easier, and looking thinner, and liking myself more, but I never considered that something as simple as moving would be so different. It’s been a wonderful surprise.


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