My First Week Back On the Wagon

I just wanted to make a quick update about my first week trying to rebuild my good eating habits. So of course this will probably turn into a 1200 word essay.

A week ago Saturday, I awoke and conducted my weekly weigh-in as per usual, to discover that I had gained around ten pounds since late November. Being that I find this unacceptable, I resolved to stop shirking my responsibilities to myself, and to start trying in earnest to be more vigilant about how much of what I was putting into my body. It honestly feels like it’s been longer than just a week, but I’m not sure if that is at all food related. I’ve had a lot going on (because I always have a lot going on), so that may be the reason why it feels as if it’s been two or three times as long as it actually has.

I was definitely not as good last week as I wish I had been. This is partially due to the fact that I was just legitimately hungry even after having my 1200 calorie allotment each day, so I would end up eating extra things. Also, my Thursday night celebration was a Bad Idea. I am, in fact, going to try cutting out food from any and all celebratory acts for myself from now on. Associating food with awesome things just makes it more difficult to maintain good self-control.

But even so, I’ve been keeping track of my calorie intake as best as I can. I am constantly grateful to how easy the internet makes it to access information. Without it, I’d be quite lost.

So Sunday I stepped on the scale for my weekly weigh-in—I was so anxious to get started on my Saturday to-do list that I forgot to weigh myself—and I lost a total of 6.4 pounds in the intervening week.

…yeah, I was pretty damn surprised, too. I was hoping I would get lucky and lose around three pounds, so that just shocked the hell out of me. To put it into perspective, my weight is now back where it was in the first week of January. So I undid a couple of months worth of work in the space of about four months, and then redid about half of it in the space of a week. It’s amazing what I can accomplish when I’m actually doing what I’m supposed to be doing.

This gives me a lot of hope for the future. My immediate goal is 160. I was almost there when the holidays happened. I’m hoping now that it won’t be long before I’m finally there.

It has also really galvanized me. Noting down every single thing I eat at every meal and keeping a record of how many calories I’m eating is tedious and annoying and I sort of hate doing it. …but losing over five pounds in one week after resuming this practice is very reassuring.

And now that I know what my calorie intake looks like from day to day, I also feel a lot better emotionally, too. It’s easy for me to beat myself up whenever I eat if I haven’t been keeping track of how many calories my food represents. I have this constant, nebulous sense of, “I shouldn’t have eaten that”, and it makes for some really dreary days.

So I’m still trying to take things one step (day/meal/whatever) at a time, but for now I feel like I’m starting to get a better handle on things. I figured given my last few entries that a nice positive check-in might be appreciated.

Know what’s also appreciated? Low-calorie ice cream bars. Om nom.

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