Why the Pain?

I asked, a very long time ago, Why do I find food so emotionally comforting?. I have yet to really come up with an answer.

But in retrospect, that might not have been the right question to ask.

The ‘Warm Embrace’ of Addiction“, written by Gabor Maté and published on October 21st of last year, details that, “The first question–always–is not ‘Why the addiction?’ but ‘Why the pain?'”

I can absolutely see the logic in this. My eating disorder is a symptom, not a cause. As for what is a/the cause…I’m not going to speculate. At least, not right now. I think that question is too large for me right this moment. But if I ever do make it in to speak with a counselor, then at least I have a record of it here. And I can certainly ponder it on my own, though it honestly feels so large that I would dearly love to have a guide to help me navigate its terrain.

But I wanted to share this article here. Certainly I’m not the only one involved with this blog who’s been asking this type of question. Maybe, like me, you haven’t been asking the right question?

Advertisements

Status Update #15

It’s time for another Status Update.

Weight on day of surgery: 239.2 lbs
Weight last time: 172.4 lbs
Weight today: 179.8 lbs
Total lost: 74.6 lbs

There will be no photo this month, as I’ve no positive progress to show. And I pretty much said everything I might have to say in this update in my last post—I’ve started anti-anxiety meds for the first time, and I need to wait and see how that affects me before I can really put much focus toward getting my eating habits back on track.

So otherwise…I hope everyone’s having a good week.